The Other Irrational Beliefs

Posted on December 29, 2010


Earlier this month, I talked about the work of Albert Ellis and created a coaching tool for you based on his theoretical and clinical work of Rational-Emotive Therapy.

We looked at one of the most common irrational beliefs-the belief that we need love and approval from those we love. By applying the IBMT to this belief, I showed you how to dissolve this irrational belief and replace it with a belief that is more logical and helpful.

But what about the other 9 irrational beliefs I promised that I would share with you? The 9 most commonly held irrational beliefs that I tailored for romantic relationships? Well, here they are.

Read the list, find the ones that resonate most deeply with you, and use the IBMT to dissolve them.

2. I must absolutely be competent, adequate and successful in aspects of dating and relationships or else I am an inadequate, worthless person.

3. People I date must act considerately and fairly all of the time and if they don’t, they are damnable villians. They are their bad actions.

4. It is awful and terrible when things don’t go the way I would like them to in my relationships.

5. I have little or no ability to decrease my distressful feelings about my relationships or lack thereof.

6. If something I fear may happen in my relationship (ie: my partner decides he/she wants to be with someone else), then I should constantly and excessively be concerned about it or dwell on the possibility of it occurring.

7. It is easier to avoid relationship difficulties than to face them.

8. My past unsuccessful history with romantic relationships is an important and predicable determiner of what will happen in my present romantic relationships.

9. My partner’s problems are horrible and I must feel upset about them.

10. There is invariably a perfect solution to every relationship problem and I must find this perfect solution.

Continue to dissolve your irrational thoughts about romantic relationships, and watch your love life blossom into a satisfying, fulfilling and rational place for you to bare your soul.