When you’re NOT attached on Valentine’s Day

Posted on February 14, 2011

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It’s Valentine’s Day.

Was that a bah humbug I just heard? Well, who could blame you.

As a single person, you are inevitably going to be subjected to a lot of unpleasant reminders that you are not in a relationship today.

One of your colleague’s going to get a dozen roses and have them on her desk for everyone to see. Someone in your office will probably be bragging about the 5 star restaurant he miraculously scored for this evening, even though no one else could get reservations. And, unfortunately, your friends who are in relationships will assume that you have nothing better to do than to listen to them tell you about their fabulous plans for this evening.

Dear God, how are you going to get through this day without throwing up?

I’ll tell you how. You are going to implement one of the strategies from my Single’s Survival Guide.

This day is going to be full of many challenging situations. Here’s a 5-step plan for dealing with one of them: people in relationships who expect you to patiently listen to their plans for this evening:

Step 1. Perfect a mildly interested smile as to not seem bitter or envious (even if you are).

Step 2. Have a standard, generic phrase that you can use intermittently while attached person is telling you about their plans.  (ie: How nice! or That sounds great! are two of my personal favorites). I give you permission to zone out while they are talking.

Step 3. Plan an exit strategy in case you find yourself stuck with the overly zealous. (Any one who wants to talk to you for more than 3-5 minutes about their plans for Valentine’s Day qualifies as overly-zealous). You can plan a bathroom break, or pretend like you just got an important phone call. Be creative. And never underestimate the need for an exit strategy.

Step 4. Do something very, very nice for yourself. Go ahead and buy some flowers, if that’s what you want. Or go see a movie you’ve been waiting to see. Or play a video game. Who cares what it is, just make sure it makes you happy.

Step 5. Remember, this too shall pass. In the not-too-distant future, you will be able to count yourself as one of the people who wants to discuss their plans for Valentine’s Day. And when that time comes, may you remember how difficult this day can be for those who are not attached.

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Posted in: Love 101